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    1. He would…except that he died in real life in 1650.

      It’s a shame this isn’t a superhero comic, because otherwise, we would soon see a hotheaded teenage French philosopher, a mathematical genius carrying a hammer and covered in steel armor, a half-machine Descartes cyborg, and a visor-wearing extraterrestrial with a Nietzschean bent, all claiming to be the real Descartes.

        1. Well, I do have a Hot Tub Nostalgia Machine. …As well as ultimate last-word omnipotence over anything that happens in the comic, including whether or not dead dudes stay dead.

          I plan to address this matter in the future.

  1. Noooooo! Descartes!!!!….

    Sigh. He thought. Therefore, he was.

    (One of my favorite characters!… Maybe he’ll be back. Anyhoo, “Reign of The Descarteses” does sound pretty epic.)

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